Not So Hot Professions
I know it’s totally superficial, but let’s just be honest with ourselves here: there are some hot professions and some not so hot professions. Let’s explore.
Cable guy – Never once have I met a hot cable guy. But, on second thought, it might be worth the free HBO (I’ve been missing me some Big Love). Perhaps I should move this to the hot profession list?
Garbage collector – The smell. Need I say more?
Accountant – I can’t help but picture a pocket protector wearing, penny pinching, boring as hell man with small hands. If you know what I mean.
Exterminator – Every time he’d touch me, I’d think about the cockroaches and ants and rats (oh my!) he’s been dealing with all day. Gross.
Plumber – There’s a reason they are known for the plumber butt. And, similar to exterminators, they are dealing with sh*t all day. Literally.
Professional student – Time to grow up and get a job. And stop smoking pot all day. Just sayin’.
Waiter – Outward appearances, they seem sorta hot. If you like cokeheads, that is. But, depending on the restaurant they work for, the free food might sway me. I can’t cook and I’m cheap, what can I say?
Mailman – I don’t know why really, but they just don’t do it for me. Maybe it’s because they always get an attitude when I park in front of the mailbox at my Mom’s house. UPS/Fedex guys, on the other hand …
Social media guy – This one is a little specific to my line of work, but if you make your living talking about Facebook, Twitter and for the love of God, “joining the conversation,” I would rather stay home alone flossing and watching Fox News than go on a date with you. And that says a lot (ask my dentist who is consistently disappointed in my flossing habits or anyone who knows just how much I hate Fox News).
Car salesman – Slimey. We all know it. And to overgeneralize a bit more, I don’t feel like the average car salesman has much respect for a woman’s intelligence and ability to purchase a car. Not so hot to this feminist.
Bus driver – I just imagine a fat guy missing one tooth too many for my tastes. And seriously, while we are on the topic, let’s just add anyone who rides the bus (and does not live in a major metropolitan area) to this list.
Drug dealer – I don’t think I need to explain this one, but a life of crime and sneaking drugs from Mexico does not sound appealing to me. Oh, but we can stop at the beach on the way back from picking up the supply? And we’re only selling marijuana to those who really need it for medical reasons? Maybe … no, still not hot. Almost had me there, though. (Clearly kidding.)
What am I missing? Do you know of a really hot bus driver that I just can’t pass up? Do tell!
Up next time … hot professions. And before you even ask, yes, firefighter is on that list.