**This blog post was supposed to go up earlier this evening, before the date, but frankly I ran out of time while getting ready (what the hell does one wear on a blind date?!) and couldn’t post it. And the irony is not lost on me that I’m too busy dating to write a blog about dating. ***
Tonight, I’m heading out on a blind date. My hairdresser that has helped me keep up the illusion that I’m a blonde for more than three years set us up. After telling her that I’m newly single, I asked if she had any single friends for me. She immediately thought of Police Officer, a longtime customer of hers. After talking once on the phone and texting for a week or so, we agreed to meet.
This is a real deal blind date. I have no idea what he looks like, haven’t checked out his Facebook page (turns out he doesn’t even have Facebook – how is that even possible in this day and age?!), but my hairdresser has assured me he’s a stand-up guy and really cute. Her husband is cute in her pictures (which means she obviously knows cute), so I’m in. Hopefully, he won’t kill me or anything – that wouldn’t be very policeman-like behavior.
Oh, and we all know that going on a blind date was on my Dating Bucket List, so I’m excited to cross off number five. Remember, I said I wanted to:
Go on a blind date. And I mean a real blind date – no Googling eachother, no Facebook stalking, no driving by their work every day to make sure they don’t seem crazy (or maybe because you actually are crazy enough to drive by their work daily). A blind date like back in the day when there were no phones, no Internet, no TV, certainly no Twitter, and a farmer from one village would set his son up with a farmer’s daughter from another village and it is a total crapshoot what you end up with. That kinda blind date.
So, Shannon the hairdresser is my farmer matchmaker. She definitely gets points for hooking me up with someone from the Hot Professions list. But trust me, I have no big expectations for this date. Here are my goals for tonight:
- Laugh. At him, or with him. I’m not picky.
- Not tell him about the blog. Or, tell him about the blog and do it in such a way that I don’t look like a crazy person (any suggestions out there for how to maneuver this?).
- Not tell him about my addiction to Felicity. We’ll save that for a future movie night.
- Not mention that today was the day we were supposed to head out on the honeymoon. That’s just plain weird.
- Initiate Uno’s (yes, Uno Chicago Grill) as my official first date spot. I actually met one other guy there for a drink a few weeks ago, so I’m off to a great start. I sort of have this vision that I will go to Uno’s for each first date I have from here on out. The wait staff will know what I’m there for, and they will run interference if the guy is crazy, and will weigh in on what they think of each guy. And, I’ll know the menu like the back of my hand so I won’t need to agonize over what to get. Most importantly, it’s super close to my house so it’s not like I have to go too far out of my way for a terrible first date. And you Richmonders – don’t judge, I love me some suburbia chain restaurants!
- Not ask him a million questions about being a police officer – Are there quotas? What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever seen? Can I drive eight miles over the speed limit and not get a speeding ticket? Can you look up my friend and tell me if he has a record (I totally think he does!)? You know, the standard stuff.
- Not mention that when I visited a Psychic Sophie yesterday on a whim, she did not see love in my future anytime soon. Cause, we all know psychics are legit and that just means this date is a total waste of time.
- And, perhaps most importantly, have him actually show up, and not leave upon first sight of me. And don’t tell me that’s an irrational fear. I watch TV – it happens.
- Updated: I meant to mention this, but another goal I had going into tonight was not to let on how much I’ve been hating on men lately. You know you have a problem when friends come over and you play the “Cause men suck” game. It’s just like when you add to the end of fortunes or random sentences the phrase “in bed” or “that’s what she said.” In this fun Catherine game, you end everything people say with “Cause men suck.” Try it, it’s totally fun. And true, much of the time.
Have you been on a blind date? How’d it turn out?