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Simply Solo Spotlight: Who Needs A Guy For Sex Anyway?!

June 19, 2012

Today’s Simply Solo Spotlight is written by Nicci Talbot, a journalist, editor and author specializing in health, sex and wellbeing. Nicci edits Rude magazine, which explores pleasure, health and personal growth through conscious kink, Taoism, Tantra and more.

Our guest post today is a little more scandalous than I usually feature on Simply Solo, but I figured since half of you guys are reading Fifty Shades of Grey, you could handle it. If you are my mom or my coworker, feel free to skip this week’s post and stand by for normal content next week!

Quick shameless plug: Do you have a story to tell? Advice to offer? Did you just have literally the worst date of your life and you must write about it? I’d love to have you as the next Simply Solo Spotlight! Find out how you can be the next writer for Simply Solo here!

Who Needs A Guy For Sex Anyway?!

So he’s just not that into you … then maybe it’s time to upgrade to a better model. Who needs a man for sex these days when discovering the world of vibrators means you’ll be far too busy to date. Take inspiration from the lovely Eva Longoria who recently confessed, “‘I own two. I have the Rabbit one and I give that as a gift all the time. It’s the best gift to give – an orgasm!” Or the far-from-desperate Teri Hatcher, “To be honest, I don’t know what I want a male for. I have some fabulous electronics to use instead. And any woman who tells you she doesn’t is lying.”

vending machine sex toys South Korea

Think this post is scandalous? Imagine seeing a sex toy vending machine, like this one in South Korea. Photo courtesy of Jon Dunbar

Being single is a special time in your life and it doesn’t come around that often, so embrace it for all it offers. You can get up and go to bed whenever you like, plan the day according to what you feel like doing and shave your pins once a week. Take joy in self-pleasure without having to worry about someone prodding you in the ribs, muttering, “Are you done yet? I’m trying to sleep.” An ex said that to me once, and talk about deflating my inner goddess. Where’s the passion in that? Needless to say, I was not happy about having to use my toys in secret and I gave him the boot shortly afterward.

Statistics show that women who use sex toys are happier, less anxious, more orgasmic and have a better body image than women who don’t. An orgasm a day is the best stress relief I know and will keep you tuned into your body and libido. If your pleasure chest is looking a little bereft, then it’s time to do some shopping. Take inspiration from the erotic bestseller Fifty Shades of Grey and invest in those little silver balls for pelvic toning. Every woman needs a Rabbit habit and the latest models are made from body safe, real feel materials and are rechargeable for hours of pleasure. Can you say the same about a man? Maybe he was a little sensitive about certain activities and you didn’t feel you could explore your sexuality freely. There are toys to pleasure all areas of the body and figuring out what you like makes it easier to direct a future partner. Have a browse through the current range of female vibrators and see what takes your fancy.

Toys that stimulate the G-spot are a great way to explore new pleasures and sensations because they stimulate a different nerve pathway. They are smaller and thinner than regular vibrators and have a curved tip to hit your sweet spot. Best of all, once they are in place, all you need to do is lie back and relax.

A final word from pop diva Missy Elliott, “I gotta bag full of toys and I don’t need none of your boys!” Happy shopping, ladies.


Copyright 2012. Simply Solo blog by Catherine Gryp. All Rights Reserved.

13 Comments leave one →
  1. June 19, 2012 9:15 am

    I know but i do prefer

  2. June 19, 2012 10:57 am

    Delightful! Running to store to buy some toys with a quick break at the Bookstore for Fifthy Shades of Grey. Thanx!

    • June 19, 2012 1:23 pm

      Enjoy:) You will probably find a dedicated section to Fifty Shades as most erotic boutiques are running workshops and lessons around it. If you’re curious to experiment I’d recommend getting a few (cheaper) basic items for BDSM play whilst you figure out what sensations and type of play you like.

  3. June 19, 2012 11:20 am

    I can’t believe you read and the referenced that horrible 50 Shades of Grey!! The sex wasn’t even that great! Lol!

    Anyways, yes, big believer in “Self Love”. No one will ever be able to do you better than you can do yourself. And the more you do yourself, the better you can tell someone how to do you. It’s the circle of sex!

    • June 19, 2012 1:28 pm

      Very true and I credit the fabulous Betty Dodson for her tireless work on this subject:) Self-love keeps you tuned into your sensual self, which is important when you are single and better than seeking out casual sex, in my view.

      Fifty Shades has sparked lots of debate around BDSM, which is great and it’s paved the way for further erotic novels and imprints, which is a good thing as erotica is often viewed as inferior to ‘proper literature’. Read today that it is the fastest selling paperback in history (UK) and has outsold both Harry Potter and The Da Vinci Code!

  4. June 19, 2012 12:37 pm

    Great post Nicci! I agree with you. My b.f. and I just went out shopping together for one a few months back. It’s been an excellent addition to the boudoir. The only thing is, I should have gotten one years and years ago (while I was married) since we rarely had sex. I’d prefer the Anne Rice books over 50 shades, though.

    • June 20, 2012 2:07 pm

      I bought Anne Rice’s Beauty trilogy recently too – quite an eye opener and really well written – a different league to Fifty Shades and I’m surprised it’s not more well known. Enjoy!

  5. June 19, 2012 1:11 pm

    There’s nothing wrong with self love, but how about doing it with your guy present? Makes it even more erotic and can be a huge turn-on. Plus, a vibrator won’t give you foreplay or tell you how beautiful you look, and there’s no substitute for a tongue. I’m just sayin’.

  6. June 19, 2012 1:33 pm

    Mutual masturbation is a huge turn on, I agree and very intimate as it doesn’t have to lead to intercourse. It’s a great way to show a new lover what you like and what turns you on. If she/he is a little shy then take the lead and bring in toys you can use together if you wish. Take your time, relax and breathe! You can turn it into a sexy mind game by banning orgasm…

  7. Amy permalink
    June 25, 2012 1:04 am

    Hi Catherine,

    I absolutely love your blog! I just ended an extremely toxic relationship a few weeks ago and have been trying to get back on my feet. I’ve been reading a few of your posts, but one question still lingers that I hope you can answer – how were you able to trust again? I’ll elaborate on my situation a bit: my ex cheated on me for a year. I emailed the other person to let her know what was going on (call me crazy, but I felt she had the right to know) and he starts telling her I’m a stalker and that I was obsessed with him, so I made it my mission in life to sabotage their relationship. I didn’t! I loved him so much and I hate all these lies he’s telling about me. I guess the emotions are still raw, but even the thought of dating makes me want to vomit. So, how did you get past the distrust from your ex and move on?

  8. June 27, 2012 8:19 am

    Reblogged this on yashparallel and commented:

  9. June 27, 2012 8:21 am

    Reblogged this on yashparallel and commented:

  10. lifeandothermisadventures permalink
    June 27, 2012 12:19 pm

    Amen, sister!

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