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Things I Love About Being Single

July 28, 2010

While being single definitely has its downsides (I can’t tell you how much I miss having someone to say goodnight to every night and there’s nothing like having a date for every work function or wedding imaginable), there are some definite positives to being single that I’m starting to realize. And please, someone remind me of this list when Christmas and Valentine’s Day roll around and I’m alone, OK?

Here are the top things I love about being single:

  1. Going to bed whenever I want, and getting up whenever I want. There’s no one to share the bed and interrupt my beauty sleep. And, there is definitely no one to wake me up with their endless snoring, at which point I have to kick them (semi-softly), which definitely interrupts a girl’s sleeping patterns.
  2. I can flirt with anything that walks. Sometimes, you just gotta flirt. And when you’ve been with the same guy since you were 18, sometimes you just gotta flirt A LOT. Just to make sure you’ve still got it. Definitely can’t do that in a relationship.
  3. Opportunity to reconnect with old friends and family. It’s amazing the relationships that you put to the side (and you may not even notice it) when you are in a relationship. I’ve loved taking the time to reconnect with those people – and have learned my lesson that I will never become disconnected from them again.
  4. Time, time, time. Time to do whatever the hell I want. Like learn how to cook, start a blog, read book after book and actually use the gym membership I’ve had for a million years. Um, for the record, I haven’t really learned to cook and the gym hasn’t seen me in quite a while, but that’s neither here nor there.  
  5. No one to judge my ice cream intake. Maybe this one is a little specific to me, but there’s nothing better than eating a bowl of ice cream for dinner. Being single allows me that luxury. I can eat all the ice cream in the world, and there is no one to judge me as I stand in the kitchen after a long day’s work with a spoon, freezer door wide open, taking just one bite (maybe two or three) of Cookies and Cream. Maybe not so good once I go through a gallon in a week, but liberating none the less.
  6. Similar to the above, no one to judge my toilet paper usage. My ex used to be amazed at the amount of toilet paper I would use weekly. I’m not sure where it all goes, but I guess I like to keep a pretty clean behind. Sometimes, I find myself using a million squares and laughing literally out loud because of how amazing it feels to use all the toilet paper in the world, and no one will ever know. Until they read this blog.
  7. No more annoying conversations about what to eat tonight. You know the ones, where you say, “What would you like to eat tonight?” And he says, “Oh, I could do anything, whatever you want.” You: “What about Chinese?” Him: “Um, no, not feeling Chinese.” You: “Thought you said you could eat anything?! What about that pizza place down the road?” Him: “No, I’m not really feeling that either. Maybe we should make something here?” You: “Ugh, I don’t feel like cooking. Maybe I’ll just eat cereal.” These conversations are like my personal hell. Make a decision and eat. It’s not that serious.
  8. I can watch whatever the hell I want on TV. And that means, endless hours of Keeping Up With The Kardashians, Food Network Challenge galore, Bachelorette every Monday night and whatever else I find that seems vaguely interesting. And there is no one to steal my remote control – cause it’s my house!
  9. Walk around naked. And not get smacked on the butt or hear lewd comments when doing so. Sometimes, walking around naked when you are living with a guy is like walking around naked next to a construction site. While I appreciate the recognition, sometimes you just wanna walk around naked for no good reason and have no one address it. You can do that as a single girl (just be sure the curtains are closed!).
  10. Do nothing. Literally, do nothing. Don’t shower, leave the house, get out of my PJs, etc., for a whole weekend if I want. And there is no one to annoyingly remind me of how nice a day it is outside, or how I really should get some fresh air, or gosh, you are really starting to stink – think you’ll shower today? If I want to stay home and be a total bum, it’s my prerogative.
  11. Things are exactly as I left them. And I mean that to say, I don’t come home to a mess that I didn’t create, or food that has mysteriously disappeared from the fridge. And speaking of food in the fridge, I can buy all the Weight Watchers ice cream sandwiches I want, and not worry about someone eating three of them because one is just not enough, never mind that those tiny portions and low fat vanilla imitation ice cream cost an arm and a leg. They are all mine.
  12. No one to ruin my mood. You know how when you are in a relationship, and sometimes you are in such a good mood, but your boyfriend/girlfriend had a shitty day and they somehow ruin your day too? Not like they meant to, but somehow they brought down your entire mood? Now, I own my moods. Good or bad. And, when I’m in a bad mood, I don’t have to answer someone a million times when they ask what’s wrong, did they do something wrong, what am I thinking? It’s just me, with my crappy mood, all evening long. Eating Weight Watchers ice cream and using absurd amounts of toilet paper.
  13. No one to criticize my driving. I’m a terrible driver. Probably among the worst. However, I can live with myself, and even find it humorous sometimes. I crack myself up sometimes when I jump an obvious curb, and I know how ridiculous it is that I’m a 25 year old woman who doesn’t know how to parallel park. But, I can live with myself, and I don’t have to hear anyone else’s commentary about my driving if I don’t want to.
  14. I can have guy friends again. Not that I was ever forbidden from having guy friends, but sometimes when you are in a relationship, it’s hard to keep guy friends around. Your partner will often think something is going on, even if it’s not, and sometimes guy friends come with awkward situations. Now, I can be friends with whoever I want, and not worry what anyone thinks of it.  
  15. Getting to know new people. While there’s definitely something to be said for knowing one person so much that you love them for everything they are and possibly can be, there is this amazing feeling you get when you meet someone new. The initial conversations, learning of their background, laughing, telling stories and connecting with another human being that you weren’t connected with before can be so much fun. For example, last night I literally spent more than four hours on the phone with a guy I just met (the Chef – you’ll hear more about him soon. Our first date is tomorrow. But after four hours on the phone, it almost feels like a second date). You can’t connect in this way with new people with you are in a relationship.
  16. No obligatory sex. You may think this is a weird one to include on the list, but we’ve all done it. We’ve all had sex when we weren’t really in the mood. Your partner is really in the mood. You are absolutely not, had a rough day and are just not feeling it. Maybe you literally “have a headache.” But, you have sex with them. You do it because, well, they asked, and they made dinner last night, maybe tomorrow’s their birthday, and well, you would want them to do it for you too if the tables were turned. A single girl does not need to worry one bit about this conundrum.
  17.  First kisses. There’s nothing like a first kiss. Really, there’s nothing like the first 20 kisses with a new partner (assuming they are a good kisser!). I plan to enjoy these – fully.
  18. No one to answer to. I can go where I want, when I want. I can stay out late, go to bed early, talk on the phone till late in the night, drop by a friend’s house to just say hello and because I don’t have any plans. I can do all these things, and not really report to anyone what time I’ll be home, or if I’ll be seeing them for dinner. While there are times that I wonder if I were to get kidnapped if anyone would notice, I definitely think overall this is a plus to being single.  
  19. Crushed velvet purple curtains. Yes, you heard that right. I have crushed velvet purple curtains in my bedroom. And I absolutely love them. No guy in his right mind would want those in his bedroom, but as a single girl I can adorn my space with whatever the hell I want. Including a picture of butterflies above my bed. Because that’s how I roll.

What’s your favorite thing about being single? If you are currently in a relationship, what do you miss about the single life? And, honestly, how much toilet paper should the average person use a week? I had to ask.


72 Comments leave one →
  1. Ashley permalink
    July 28, 2010 9:43 am

    Wow…although we’ve never met, sometimes the similarities are scary…”no one to judge your ice cream intake” – I regularly eat a tub of Ben and Jerry’s for dinner. Healthy? No. But I figure that I’m allowed. If and when the weight starts to pile on then I can rethink my strategy!

  2. Dawn permalink
    July 28, 2010 10:35 am

    Well there is no one to report to about where you have been as long as D is not spending the night upstairs, lol!

  3. natasha permalink
    July 28, 2010 1:21 pm

    Lol, that’s what I was thinking too Dawn 🙂 He’d notice if Catherine was kidnapped.

  4. debra settles permalink
    July 28, 2010 1:59 pm

    Gosh I miss all the above! I miss going to bed when i want to…I miss eating what i want. Basically you put almost everything I miss in this post 🙂 Except for toliet paper, i guess with 4 people in a house, the toliet paper is supose to just dissapear. LOL I love you!

  5. Random Cook permalink
    July 28, 2010 5:45 pm

    The best part about being single is the anticipation of not being single anymore. The excitement of wondering who the next “fish” will be. Could be anyone. Its always better than you had hoped. And it was more like 5 hours, but who’s counting?

  6. July 28, 2010 8:19 pm

    hahaa. it all starts out with laughing, and of course, should end that way too. you’re a great writer and i like the honesty-even when what you talk about isn’t that hard to bare, its the overall effect…the simplicity of the writing i think many people can relate too. is there a certain amount of time thats too much time to be single? could i be making a world record and not even notice? possibly, i tell you. i enjoy all that stuff on a daily basis, and maybe i should be the one reporting to someone else or buying more ice cream bc its all gone, but in the meantime im with you…too much fun. its great about the toilet paper bc im the type of person who literally likes the ball up the paper first and then use it. when i was younger and someone asked for a kleenex i would ball that up too until i was told people don’t like that. and its highly wastful. but i still do bc we all have our habits, right?

    you commented last week on my blog about buttons. i thought about what you said and first of all, i don’t even remember the last time one of those spare buttons actually came in handy when i was needing the right one on a sweater. its totally useless. anyways, until you find a more creative idea to do with them, maybe you could find an old clear glass jelly jar and fill them with the assortment of buttons. im the type of person that loves filling clear bottles and such with things to decorate a place in a unique way…they can look pretty. on a side note…if you find a pretty little vase (from like pottery barn or something) fill it with sugar or salt, then lay really light colored or black stones you find on top.

  7. July 28, 2010 10:42 pm

    See, it is just this kind of honesty that causes one to fall in love with another – which of course runis the whole thing because then we can’t be this kind of honest – or should I say comfortable. For a long time I tried to be, instead of just being and in the end, it leads to unhappiness. If you can be yourself and I mean really be yourself and find someone that loves you being that way, you’ll love being in a relationship. The smiles, memories and laughter far outway the concerns over TP usage. How many songs are written about love that was good and love gone bad? Tons – get out there and engage – write some songs!!!

  8. Millie Turner (Mom) permalink
    July 29, 2010 12:01 am

    I would know if you were Catherine napped 😉

  9. July 30, 2010 5:43 pm

    Unless I’m a bad reader, I can smell that you’re actually making yourself happy out of the current situation. Yes, you now enjoy these things just because you had a shocking experience, of which I don’t know anything. You tried your best, but sorry I felt you actually miss them (unless you didn’t love your ex truly) and trying to turn sorrows into enjoyable facts. However, it was fun reading this post. Though as a guy i don’t think I’ll do those stuffs with my [if i had a] girlfriend, like disturbing when sleeping, hanging out with friends, etc. That toilet paper is a new issue, though. 😉

  10. August 2, 2010 4:56 pm

    Walking around naked might be my favorite thing about living alone. But I’ve started dating again and the amount of attention these guys want when I haven’t even gone on a date with them yet is kind of mind-blowing. So I’m feeling the doing nothing part of this post lately. I like to clean my apartment write and not shower until it is all done on the weekends. I also like to not have to call, text or see other people during that time.

  11. August 9, 2010 8:15 pm

    Excellent list but I’d like to add a few:
    – Bills are always paid on time.
    – I don’t have to hang out with his judgmental mother (sister/father/brother).
    – It’s no longer necessary to wax my hoo-ha every few weeks.

    • August 10, 2010 2:11 am

      HAHAHA – good call on the hoo-ha. I definitely appreciate that I don’t have to shave (my legs or otherwise lol) if I don’t want to! Thanks for adding to the list. 🙂

  12. Ghetto_Philosopher permalink
    September 1, 2010 5:08 am

    I am a guy. You don’t want to hear my “things I love about being single” list. By the way, I think you should show this list to the next guy you get serious with. I guarantee he’d love most if not all of this. Ok I don’t guarantee. I don’t want to be that guy that randomly guarantees things. I am starting to use guarantee too much, so I’ll just end here…..

    • September 1, 2010 6:10 pm

      Haha, maybe the guy would like it? Not sure. We’ll see, I’m sure the guy I’m serious with next will eventually read the blog. I actually would want to hear what’s on a guy’s list. I bet it includes random hook ups 🙂

  13. October 2, 2010 12:01 pm

    I’m a guy, and my list actually pretty closely mirrors yours. Plus, I wouldn’t mind crushed velvet purple drapes, but then again, only if I were in a room-darkening mood.

    • October 2, 2010 7:38 pm

      Good to know my list isn’t as female-specific as I thought. The crushed velvet purple drapes are AWESOME for a room-darkening mood. You wouldn’t even know it’s daytime if my curtains are closed. But, that’s not necessarily good for trying to force yourself out of bed and into work in the morning. All a tradeoff, I guess! 🙂

  14. October 4, 2010 9:04 pm

    Hi Catherine!

    Love this blog! I too have made a change in perspective this year – I am writing about all the things that bring me joy this year! Check it out!

    http://lauriesims.wordpress.com/

    and the best thing about being single is not having to put things away (dishes, clothes, shoes, bags, STUFF in general) until YOU want too!

    • October 4, 2010 9:37 pm

      Thanks so much! Nice to meet you. Will definitely be checking out your blog as well. Good point on not putting stuff away. I live in a constant state of unfolded clothes. And there is NO ONE to judge me for it!!

  15. November 18, 2010 1:20 am

    YES! Love these — especially #9: I have a newish boyfriend (6 months) and anytime I wander around the apartment naked, he over-gushes about how beautiful I look, etc. I really DO appreciate this — but maybe not EVERY single time, OK?

    And I’m with you on #6 — I’m an excessive TP user as well, and I don’t care.

    • November 21, 2010 9:50 pm

      Haha, agree. Every once in awhile just to know you are appreciated is good, but not every time you walk around! 🙂 Glad to hear I’m not the only excessive TP user. It’s kind of a problem over here, but I don’t care enough to do anything about it!

  16. BeneathTheSpinLight permalink
    December 14, 2010 3:28 am

    It’s the holidays. Remember this list, because I just found it and I’m in love with it!
    Also, one roll a day is too much. But I promise not to judge you if you use more than that.

  17. June 21, 2011 11:29 am

    I LOVE this post and identify to many of them. For me, I like not rushing home from work.

    • June 27, 2011 6:41 pm

      Thanks, Beckyyk,
      That’s a good addition. I like not having to tell someone what time I’m getting home from work – I get home whenever I feel like it! 🙂

  18. June 21, 2011 5:54 pm

    I have been married for a little over a year now, and I do miss the single days… And most of my ex’s are douche bags (now that I really think about it LOL) But honestly, I love my husband… I don’t miss being single because he’s like my best friend, I can do all these things with him… EVEN use all the toliet paper in the world! HA HA HA! LMAO — But When I first got together with him it was sooooo hard to let go of my single lifestyle!!! It was like breaking up with someone LOL!! So enjoy being single and maybe the next person who you are with will leave your damn ice cream sandwiches alone LOL (Good LUCK! I like your posts!)– Mary

    • June 21, 2011 6:01 pm

      I contridicted myself.. LOL I really dont miss all the carzy things I could do singel, but I do miss being friends with guys and girls LOL

  19. June 23, 2011 1:08 am

    While some of this list *is* a bit more for the single life, you *can* still have many of these things. It’s all dependent on the type of relationship you’re in and the level of compromise. Even casual relationships can give you these freedoms, so long as the boundaries and comfort level are set on the get-go. It’s all about communication and context.

    Though I certainly don’t think you view relationships as being restrictive, I think that relationships need to be approached more as an enhancement to your life rather than an adjustment. An adjustment implies having to change to accommodate, whereas an enhancement implies improvements without having to change yourself. While this *does* sound contradictory to the notion of compromise, it is entirely possible to sacrifice without having to give up too much of yourself.

    • June 27, 2011 9:21 pm

      theFRANCHISE,
      I think you make some really good points. I’m certainly not willing to give up some of these things I’ve learned to love…. so I will be building many of these things into my relationship self as well. Appreciate your comment! 🙂

  20. July 16, 2011 3:43 pm

    Amen to number 8 and 11!! I don´t have to apologize for the mindless TV anymore, no one is there to make me feel guilty about it! And things are where I left them- I don´t know about you but I have a pet peeve that involves me picking up forks from the bedroom, clothes in the kitchen, and soap from the living room! Things have a place where they belong!!

    • July 18, 2011 9:47 pm

      Shetraces,
      Completely agree!! It’s so nice to know everything is exactly where you left them… It’s so frustrating if you can’t find something and it turns out your boyfriend moved it. Especially when it makes you late to work! I love that any mess is MY mess. And a clean, beautiful home? ALL MINE!

  21. July 16, 2011 3:44 pm

    PS- Shaving my legs is the biggest pain to women, but unfortunately, I still have to do this while single.
    Also, I think you should write a HOW TO FLIRT list.

    • July 18, 2011 9:46 pm

      Shetraces,
      Yeah, still gotta shave the legs in the summer. But the winter, I could go weeks if there is no man in my life! I will admit, though, that I there is nothing like freshly shaven legs on clean sheets…. refreshing. 🙂 Sometimes you gotta do those things for yourself!
      Hmmm….how to flirt. I’ll have to think on that one, lol! Thanks for the suggestion. I have a few tips I could share — but I would be waaay more interested in what the readers could add to my list!

  22. August 11, 2011 8:55 am

    Great post. I actually miss having someone around me :((( Im not good really at being alone and it’s been 2 months now… I wish I could enjoy and make my own list too…

    • August 11, 2011 7:56 pm

      April,
      Why not?! Make your own list. The key to enjoying being alone or living alone is to constantly pay attention to the things you enjoy. Remind yourself daily. And then you’ll start to really appreciate things more if you pay attention them.

      • August 11, 2011 8:15 pm

        Thanks Catherine, It’s really good to come across your site… boosting up my spirit 🙂

        And yeah since I read your post, I’ve been thinking of making my own list too 🙂 Happy friday!!

  23. sassy lassie permalink
    August 14, 2011 10:19 pm

    Ugh, this is the best thing ever. I’m trying to dump my boyfriend but I think he knows it’s coming so he’s avoiding my calls. Which is part of why I’m breaking up with him.

    anyway, I love being single, which I forgot for a while. I definitely can’t wait to walk around naked and flirt with everyone in the world. It’s so much more fun than being ignored.

    holla holla two times to every girl out there who wants to be single, because we don’t need any man.

    • August 18, 2011 10:51 pm

      Sassy,
      So happy to hear you are feeling positive about being single again. Good luck with the breakup – sounds like it might be tough to tell him if he’s an avoider. And cheers to your newfound single life 🙂

  24. Victoria permalink
    August 28, 2011 10:47 pm

    You’re blogs have been helping me so much. My ex is really mean and yet I still find myself missing him. Reminding myself of all the things better than a jerk though really makes me appreciate being single. You are the best.

  25. Becca permalink
    September 5, 2011 1:09 am

    This is my life right now. Thank you so much for this list!

  26. September 19, 2011 7:49 pm

    Those are some compelling reasons to love singlehood. 🙂 My boyfriend and I have been together for over 3 years now and I am still annoyed at how he corrects how I pronounce “coupon.” Add to the list: “not being annoyed by pronunciation corrections.” 🙂

    • September 24, 2011 9:30 pm

      Haha, Lisa. That’s a really good addition. Say coupon however the hell you want to!!

  27. Renae permalink
    September 20, 2011 1:54 pm

    I don’t know how I stumbled on this sight but it really helps!! I have a 6 year relationshp down the drain ( High school sweethears ) So this site is helping me realize I will be okay!! Thanks :0

    • September 24, 2011 9:29 pm

      Thanks, Renae! Glad this helped and thanks for stopping by!

  28. thea permalink
    November 23, 2011 3:59 pm

    I can’t tell you how much reading this actually helped me…I was in one of those moments where you start doubting everything about the love you once had because you feel like you’ll never find someone again. This made me laugh as I was crying and on the verge of calling him…thank you so much; you truly are guiding so many newly single women!

    • November 26, 2011 8:58 pm

      Thea,
      Thank you so much for your comment and I’m sorry to hear what you’ve been going through. Don’t doubt you’ll find someone again… you will. Just give yourself time to heal so you are ready for the next go round. Take care of yourself and thanks for commenting 🙂

  29. Danielle permalink
    December 1, 2011 12:18 am

    Having sex with a partner who is not also enthusiastically into it…not my cup of tea. If I’m not in the mood, then that’s that. Same with the other person. Personally, if anyone made me feel sex was obligatory for any reason…well, back to being single 😀

  30. Danielle permalink
    December 1, 2011 1:58 am

    Also-finding your blog is the best thing that’s happened to me all day. I thought I was past the “500 knives are being stabbed into my chest” phase, but I only got a week’s relief :/

    Thanks for sharing what you’ve been through, I cannot even imagine how much strength you possess.

    • December 4, 2011 9:23 pm

      Danielle,
      I’m so glad you found my blog and I have been able to provide you with at least a little bit of comfort. Take care of yourself 🙂

  31. Sylmar permalink
    January 15, 2012 1:36 am

    For me the best thing would be not having to worry when my ex will cheat on next!!!
    Also, i love that I don’t have to cook for someone else, and i can stick to my diet!!!

  32. February 1, 2012 10:48 am

    Hey Catherine, I love this post! I’ve had your blog on my blogroll for awhile. I was looking for some material to write for single people before Valentine’s Day. I came across this post and I like it so much I want to reblog it on my blog. Let me know if this is okay with you. I would give the credit to you and link this post and your blog in my post. Thanks for sharing your wisdom with the masses!!

    • February 1, 2012 11:02 am

      Thank you! Of course! I would be very flattered. Give me a heads up when it goes up so I can come check it out 🙂 Thanks!!

      • February 1, 2012 11:34 am

        Thanks so much! I will be posting it tomorrow. I’m writing one for Valentine’s Day early because I send out an email campus wide to all students at the beginning of the month with links to my recent posts. Your post will be perfect as the last post before I send out that email. Thanks again!!

        • February 1, 2012 12:32 pm

          Perfect! I really appreciate you thinking of me. Huge honor … And love the approach to Valentine’s Day. Take care!

  33. March 30, 2012 7:25 am

    Great Post. I am not single, but sometimes when you have a tough day in a relationship, its comforting to see that there are other options and ppl are surviving. I miss having as much time with my girlfriends. I moved across the world to be with my boyfriend and although I’ve made new friends, I really miss nights out and gossiping about rubbish with my girlfriends, laughing about past relationships, etc !

    • March 31, 2012 9:52 pm

      I bet you do miss your friends! I would too – that must be really hard. But the great thing about really good friends is that when you reconnect, even after years and years, things are just the same and you can pick up where you left off!

  34. April 10, 2012 10:07 am

    dang i missed this…thanks the for the list of reminders now my spirit is lifted once more not getting worried about being single.. just silmpy solo:)

  35. April 30, 2012 11:02 pm

    for number 7, Date a fat guy. We don’t give a fuck about what to eat as long as its the right amount.

  36. August 20, 2012 3:04 am

    Reblogged this on Whatever Comes To Mind and commented:
    Being newly single, it’s been a trail of hits and misses. But here is why I’m actually happier….

  37. Katie permalink
    October 3, 2012 12:09 am

    I’m SO glad I found this blog… I’m newly single after almost 7 years, and I’ve been with him since I was 18. I’ve tried several times to get out of the relationship, because I felt my life was just passing me by. I was always afraid of being alone, and also because I hadn’t known anything else. Reading your blogs, your funny advice, listening to empowering songs and the joys of being single, all are making it easier for me. You have NO idea. I appreciate it so much. 🙂 I’ve officially saved your blog to my FAVORITES. Thank you again!!!

  38. Ana permalink
    October 25, 2012 10:32 pm

    I love the freedom! I can come and go as I please, do whatever I want. No more watching something in the cinema that I didn’t want to see or fighting b/c I’m tired and want to go home, but he doesn’t want to leave yet and can’t conceive the idea of me walking home alone (did he ever realize I did function before him?) or having to rent 2 DVDs b/c he just can’t decide which one he wants (even after I’ve told him we won’t have time to watch them or I won’t have time to return then).

    I’m free.

  39. July 24, 2013 5:24 pm

    Reblogged this on A Reach For Glory.

Trackbacks

  1. 10 Things I Learned in 2010 « Simply Solo: Single girl starting over – follow the journey
  2. Catherine’s Dating Resume « Simply Solo: Single girl starting over – follow the journey
  3. Ode to Ice Cream « Simply Solo: Single girl starting over – follow the journey
  4. Culturally Inept « Simply Solo: Single girl starting over – follow the journey
  5. Things I Love About Being Single | College Life- Sex and Relationships
  6. “Simply Solo” a blog written by Catherine Gryp

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